Is it selfish?

I am incredibly comfortable with myself.

  • I’m Catholic and I really love being so.
  • Same goes for being single.

So the thought that has been nagging me for the past 2 days has been that hopefully its not some how selfish to enjoy being single, Catholic, and virgin; and to be comfortable with it that I don’t cherish the idea of ever being married and having to give up the virginity.

I don’t want to lose it. I want to keep it forever.

Does that make sense to any of you?

It’s not really a point of confusion for me; it seems to come naturally to me.

Yet, there’s this sense of taboo about virginity, and even more so about keeping it. And not just “in the world” but also in the fact that this isn’t discussed in the Church. The only time I’ve ever talked about it with a person is with a friend who’s Baptist and she said that she remains pure because God takes pleasure in it. End of conversation.

Marriage is beautiful, as are children. And as attractive as a man might be, I don’t have ANY desire to marry him. As cute and adorable babies and little kiddies might be, I don’t want to have them. This leaves me with three wonderful choices to make: religious life, consecrated virgin, or be a celibate member in a lay ministry such as Opus Dei, which I really enjoy participating in although I’m not yet a member.

Any yet, although I only have 3 to choose from, the possibilities still seem infinite.

Oh boy, do I need a spiritual advisor or what?


5 Replies to “Is it selfish?”

  1. Megan, the answer to your question can only come by considering it in the presence of God and maybe discussing it with a very close personal friend or your confessor. Ask God what He wants from you and He will definitely answer you. BTW, also ask Our Lady as she will help you as well. Cheers, Phillip

  2. Hmmm… It isn’t selfish at all.Just remember that the point of being single is still in order to be more available to love God and serve the others.And one more thing to consider in discernment: Is being single what really what God wants for me or is it me who wants it?Will pray for you.

  3. Megan, yes, you could benefit wonderfully from seeing a spiritual advisor on a regular basis. Go for it!You said that you have 3 choices — and you do — sort of. I say “sort of” because it’s really God who choses us, who calls us to be either married or single, either a member of a religious or lay community or a consecrated virgin. By all means, do explore these possibilities — and ask the Holy Spirit to enlighten you so that you will know what God is calling you to be. May God give you His peace! You are in my prayers.

  4. If I were your spiritual advisor helping you to discern your vocation, I’d ask you these questions:Why do you enjoy participating in Opus Dei activities? Is that enjoyment possibly a sign that God is leading you in that direction?If you are participating in their activities, why haven’t you talked with an Opus Dei priest or numerary? Is the fact that you haven’t talked to one a sign that God is not leading you in that direction? or you just did not think of having an Opus Dei spiritual director and are thinking of it still? – from the Philippines ūüôā

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