Family

Can be attricious.

The situation: My roomate made plans beginning of May to move out and did so this past Sunday. I’m swinging rent in excess of $1500 by myself for August. I’ve found a place to share with coworker for total $1265. That’s a savings of $150/month for me.

My dad offered financial assistance last week. I held off & he retracted it Sunday morning. Then he had buyers remorse, and called me today. He wants me to stay at current place, which I csnnot afford with my student debt & car loans. I can’t afford to eat at this point.

His thought is that I submitted paperwork to Sallie Mae to adjust my loans & is counting my chickens before they hatch. Yet SM hasn’t responded yet.

If you withdraw support, don’t you think the horse will stop pulling the cart, and kick you? Especially when you tease the horse?

Migraine

is a brain on mutiny, cramming and screaming against the skull.

 

I started getting migraines nearly a decade ago, and they used to be really bad. I would get them during mid-terms, final exams, and other routinely stressful events in college. I never thought much about it, considered it normal. I remember several study sessions where I would have to discreetly stack the 20 books and psychological journals I had found (hoping the student workers wouldn’t return them to the shelf), scurry down 9 floors to the bathroom and try not to dry heave. Yay nausea! Every semester and mid-term for 4 years of undergrad and 2 years of grad school were just like this.

 

Somewhere along the way I learned this wasn’t normal and that I didn’t have to put up with these shenanigans.  I think it was somewhere along the time of taking over 1000mg of Excedrin not working, 100mg of Naproxen Sodium barely works, too (like today). One time I took about 37mg of Vicodin (split a 75mg pill) and that worked for the pain, hell on the nausea (I felt like I was at sea in my bed!).

I’ve tried Imitrex, but if I’m laid up in bed (like now) with a heating pad on my neck due to the tight neck, back, and jaw muscles, why would I want to double my pain by taking Imitrex? Yet I did for the past two years. I finally stopped taking it this past fall.  Currently I work through the pain. I get up and go to work. Only about once every six months do I get to the point of cancelling afternoon sessions, swallow back the nausea and curl up in bed. I think I’ve been in pain for 12 hours now. I have had 3 “naps” this afternoon, and I’m so exhausted just from the pain alone. Even the furballs notice that tonight is different, since they’re not getting scooped up and allowed to run around.  As soon as I kick my shrink to the curb, I’m gonna go get me a neurologist, since I’m getting migraine symptoms without the migraines. =0) Life is fun.

The Problem with Roommates

I used to be friends with my current roommate: go out clubbing, dinners together, drunk shopping, etc. We were good enough friends to think that moving into an apartment would be okay. I’m sure you’re shaking your heads by now!

I think the charm lasted about a month: she came home at reasonable times, her boyfriend came by but kept it decent, she washed and put away her dishes. Then she began to stay away more evenings than she slept in her own bed, would not take out the trash or even replace the bag.

She used me for therapy on more than one occasion, until I switched it up on her – I don’t work with adults for a reason: all therapeutic suggestions I made were based on what I would do at work (i.e. collages, art, symbolism, playdoh) and she stopped asking. I told her that she needs to find her own therapist; she complained about the cost until I pointed out to her that she can find someone covered by her plan, which was met with more hemming and hawing. As of last month she was having arguments with her boyfriend, shouting about how she’s not using him as her therapist. I turned on the white noise machine after that.

You’ve heard the story of the chunky mold in the soda can, right? Well, you have if you’re an in-the-flesh friend or coworker. I cleaned the den, kitchen, my bathroom from floor to ceiling; while I was sorting the recycleables, a can from her room felt like it was full of liquid, so I tried to dump it in the sink…chunky green mold.

We had a talk about many things after that weekend: she needs to tell me about the electricity and internet bills (her response, why didn’t you bring this up before? Doll, it’s your bill, therefore your responsibility) . Or taking out the trash – which she still doesn’t do. Airing out her room ….nope hasn’t worked on that either. She wants to move out on her own – but she’s never been on her own even when she has her own place; instead spends a lot of time with whoever’s her boyfriend at the moment.

Leaves me in a pickle since I can’t afford this place on my own, unless I eat Ramen every day. She says she won’t leave me stranded, but seriously? I’ve heard “I’ll clean” and “I’ll air it out” &c.  She suddenly wants to help me and list the place on Craigslist. But when we moved in here, she dragged her feet and couldn’t get the last place cleaned (whoops?) without requesting an additional week. I don’t have those kinds of funds – to pay rent on one place as I move my stuff out and put a deposit on a new one.

What’s it take to find a clean and respectful roommate?

Epic Fail by Plain-Clothed Nuns

Click on the title of the post, as it takes you straight to the site.

How to know that you should steer clear of a community:

If they post a “Former Members Reunion” on their front page.

*facepalm*